Scary Vampires

Listen Babies,

We don't have much time because we all have to be at Cole's by 8:00 tonight for the comedy open mic. In case you don't know how these things work I'll spell it out for you.

1. Go to Cole's.
2. Buy me a drink (and get one for yourself).
3. Foz drinks Manhattans, ladies.
4. If you are funny put your name on Cameron Esposito's sign up list.
5. If not, just find a seat.
6. Watch Foz the Hook play at 9:00.
7. Watch Cameron play at 9:30. Be careful, she'll make you pee. Well, she won't force you to pee. She'll persuade you to pee through funniness.
8. After that I don't care much. If you're funny, get up there and show off.

OK, I never promised that I wouldn't use this blog to shill for me. As most of you know I make my bread by dealing in Abraham Lincoln stuff. You know, Lincoln signatures, documents, art, artifacts. Things like that. Anyway, Seth Grahame Smith's Abraham Lincoln Vampire Hunter went on sale yesterday, and you would love it. It's a sweet mash-up of fake biography and Gothic satire from the author of Pride and Prejudice and Zombies.

You'll love it. But more importantly, you'll buy it. You'll buy it from me.

But you say "Foz, how can I buy a book over the InterWeb?" Here's how. Go to this web site. Get out your credit card, and buy the damnthing. You know you want it. The details are all here.

You can also buy it by meeting me at Cole's, buying me a drink, inviting me back to your place, cooking me a steak, putting on a little soft music, giving and receiving a little back rub, making sweet love all night long, sleeping in, buying me breakfast, surprising me at work, buying the book, meeting me later for supper, going out to see a little Jazz at the Greenmill, home for more love making, bringing me coffee and fruit in bed, and reading to me from the poetry of Anne Sexton.

Either way is good with Old Foz.